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what I learned from Bloodsport

June 4, 2008

You know it. You love it.

If you haven’t seen it, go rent it, watch it, buy it, make it a part of your martial arts library. Here’s a list of things I learned from the king of all tournament movies – Bloodsport!

  1. You can always run away from the FBI because they’re old, overweight and utterly pathetic at their jobs
  2. A punch to the balls works a lot better than the dreaded Dim Mak
  3. Having a kumite tournament underground ensures that none of the grappling arts are represented
  4. Doing the splits ups your chances in getting laid
  5. Proud Harley-Davidson riding Americans pick the worst times to be patriotic
  6. “Tanaka sifu” is the correct way to address your Japanese ninjitsu instructor when in Hong Kong
  7. Throwing blinding powder to win a fight only works if you opponent has NOT had any blindfold training
  8. Nothing says “significant emotional scene” like slow motion
  9. Always kick with the right leg, push people and close doors with the left
  10. Frank Dux is a douche but a likable one
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